Explore how Stoic principles complement correct biblical teachings for meaningful living.
My Take On Blending The Two Concepts For Accountability
In a society dominated by instant gratification and hair-trigger tempers, it’s easy to lose sight of wisdom that encourages reflection and patience. The ancient philosophy of Stoicism and the biblical teachings from Scripture offer profound tools to ground us in self-discipline, humility, and compassion. Combining these two traditions gives us a path not only for personal accountability but for maintaining harmony with others amidst life’s turbulence.
**Stoicism** teaches us to embrace what we can control and accept with calm detachment the things we cannot. Biblical principles, particularly those found in the Amplified Bible, emphasize living with kindness, love, and forgiveness. Together, these teachings call for a kind of self-mastery that rejects the impulsiveness often found in today’s fast-paced world. When we pause to think, “What would Jesus do?” or remind ourselves of the Stoic maxim to “control your perceptions,” we start practicing emotional regulation and moral clarity.
The Bible says in Proverbs 16:32 (AMP): "He who is slow to anger is better and more honorable than the mighty [soldier], and he who rules and controls his own spirit, than he who captures a city." This aligns perfectly with the Stoic goal of ruling over oneself. Both traditions insist that the real battle is not external but internal: conquering our impulses, selfish desires, and unchecked emotions.
When we marry the biblical command to love your neighbor as yourself with the Stoic idea of universal brotherhood, we become more patient with others and more forgiving of ourselves. Neither philosophy condones passivity, though—they encourage us to take responsibility for our actions and engage with life in a way that reflects wisdom and grace.
Today’s world demands quick reactions—whether it’s responding to a text message or voicing our opinion on social media. But Stoicism and the Bible invite us to step back and reflect. Practicing patience in a world that rewards immediacy allows us to be truly present. This moment of pause—this restraint—is where accountability is born.
**Conclusion:** The fusion of Stoicism and biblical wisdom teaches us to slow down, focus on what really matters, and take responsibility for how we live. In doing so, we escape the traps of impulse and pride, becoming people of inner peace and outward kindness. This combination is not just a survival strategy but a roadmap for thriving in a chaotic world.
Choices: The Crossroads Between Faith and Philosophy
Life is a series of choices, and both the teachings of Jesus and the principles of Stoicism emphasize the importance of making decisions intentionally. The Amplified Bible reminds us in Deuteronomy 30:19: "I call heaven and earth as witnesses against you today, that I have set before you life and death, the blessing and the curse; therefore, you shall choose life in order that you may live, you and your descendants." This verse highlights that every decision we make has the potential to either build or destroy, not just for ourselves but for those who follow us. Similarly, Stoicism teaches that our actions should align with our inner virtues, emphasizing self-discipline and control over emotions. Epictetus wrote, “We cannot choose our external circumstances, but we can always choose how we respond to them.”
What both Jesus and the Stoics are pointing toward is the freedom we have in how we respond to life’s challenges. This is a truth that offers both empowerment and responsibility. Jesus emphasized love as the guiding force behind all actions: Matthew 22:37-39 (AMP): "‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. The second is like it, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself [that is, unselfishly seek the best or higher good for others].’" From a Stoic perspective, this aligns perfectly with the idea of virtue as the highest good. The Stoics believed that to live a good life, we must cultivate wisdom, courage, justice, and temperance—not for the sake of reward, but because these are the principles by which life is meant to be lived.
Both teachings are clear: we do not control the outcome of every situation, but we control how we respond. Jesus taught in John 16:33 (AMP): "In the world you have tribulation and distress and suffering, but be courageous [be confident, be undaunted, be filled with joy]; I have overcome the world." This aligns with the Stoic notion that external events cannot disturb the peace within, unless we allow them to. Marcus Aurelius reminds us, “You have power over your mind—not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.” Both teachings invite us to reflect inward, to see obstacles not as barriers, but as opportunities for growth.
The harmony between Jesus' teachings and Stoicism is found in the realization that the choices we make begin within. Each choice is a chance to reflect on who we are becoming and what principles guide us. Whether it is Jesus' call to love unconditionally or the Stoic imperative to cultivate virtue, both paths lead toward a life rooted in intention and inner peace.
This blog, therefore, becomes a meditative exercise. It is not just about dissecting past experiences but learning how to respond better moving forward. It's about practicing self-awareness, embracing accountability, and developing a moral compass—not out of guilt, but out of a genuine desire to grow.
As James 1:2-4 (AMP) puts it: "Consider it nothing but joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you fall into various trials. Be assured that the testing of your faith [through experience] produces endurance [leading to spiritual maturity, and inner peace]. And let endurance have its perfect result and do a thorough work, so that you may be perfect and completely developed [in your faith], lacking in nothing." Likewise, Stoicism teaches that challenges are not curses but teachers. In the words of Seneca: “Difficulties strengthen the mind, as labor does the body.” Each trial is an opportunity to become more resilient, more virtuous, and ultimately more free.
This is the core of what I aim to explore in this space. I am learning to unlearn the toxic lessons I inherited, to replace anger with reflection, and to replace control with surrender to a higher principle. This is not about perfecting life, but about living it authentically, making choices guided by both faith and reason. This is where Christianity and Stoicism meet—at the crossroads of intentional living.
What Is This Teaching Me?
Life is constantly speaking to us through challenges, relationships, and circumstances. The question, "What is this teaching me?" invites us to slow down and reflect instead of reacting impulsively. This meditative exercise shifts the focus from external blame to internal growth, a practice emphasized by both Jesus and the Stoics.
James 1:5 (AMP) offers this wisdom: "If any of you lacks wisdom [to guide him through a decision or circumstance], he is to ask of [our benevolent] God, who gives to everyone generously and without rebuke or blame, and it will be given to him." Here, we are encouraged to seek meaning and guidance when confronted by difficulties. In the same way, Stoicism teaches us that every obstacle presents an opportunity to practice virtue. As Marcus Aurelius said, “The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.”
When faced with pain, anger, or fear, instead of asking, "Why me?" we learn to ask, "What is this teaching me?" This simple shift in perspective empowers us to reclaim our agency. Jesus modeled this mindset in the most trying of circumstances, even as He prayed in the Garden of Gethsemane: Matthew 26:39 (AMP): "My Father, if it is possible [that is, consistent with Your will], let this cup pass from Me; yet not as I will, but as You will." His surrender wasn’t passive acceptance, but an acknowledgment that even suffering has purpose within the larger framework of God’s will. Similarly, Stoicism encourages us to focus on what we can control—our thoughts, actions, and responses—and to let go of what we cannot.
This exercise teaches patience. Not every lesson reveals itself immediately, and some truths only emerge after we’ve allowed ourselves to sit with discomfort. Both Jesus and the Stoics remind us that discomfort is not the enemy—our aversion to it is. As Seneca wisely noted, “A gem cannot be polished without friction, nor a man perfected without trials.”
In practice, asking "What is this teaching me?" encourages us to take ownership of our growth. For example, when a loved one disappoints us, the lesson might not be about their behavior but about our expectations. When we face rejection, it might be an opportunity to cultivate humility and resilience. Both Stoicism and Jesus’ teachings suggest that these moments are where the real work begins—not in the absence of challenges, but in how we transform through them.
Romans 5:3-5 (AMP) reinforces this transformation: "And not only this, but [with joy] let us exult in our sufferings and rejoice in our hardships, knowing that hardship (distress, pressure, trouble) produces patient endurance; and endurance, proven character; and proven character, hope and confident assurance [of eternal salvation]." Likewise, Epictetus advises: "It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters." Both teachings highlight that growth is found in the process—not in avoiding hardship, but in meeting it with patience and a willingness to learn.
Asking "What is this teaching me?" is not just a mental exercise; it’s a spiritual discipline. It’s a way of aligning our actions with purpose, seeking wisdom in the midst of chaos, and growing into the people we are meant to become. It teaches us to embrace life with all its ups and downs, knowing that everything we encounter—joy or sorrow—can contribute to our journey if we let it.
So, what is life teaching you today? Maybe it’s patience, forgiveness, or perseverance. Maybe it’s showing you areas where you need to set boundaries or inviting you to trust the process even when you don’t understand it. Whatever it is, this exercise reminds us to look within, reflect deeply, and move forward intentionally.
What Have I Learned?
The journey of introspection eventually brings us to this question: "What have I learned?" It’s the point where we stop running from the past, confront our patterns, and assess the wisdom we’ve gained. This isn’t just a reflection on what life has thrown at us—it’s about the choices we made, the battles we fought (internally and externally), and how we’ve changed along the way.
Proverbs 4:7 (AMP) teaches: "The beginning of wisdom is: Get [skillful and godly] wisdom [it is preeminent]! And with all your acquiring, get understanding [actively seek spiritual discernment, mature comprehension, and logical interpretation]." It’s not enough to simply survive life’s trials. True learning involves understanding why we behaved the way we did and what can be done differently moving forward. In the same way, the Stoics remind us that life is a constant exercise in gaining clarity. As Epictetus says, “First say to yourself what you would be; and then do what you have to do.”
One hard-earned lesson I’ve encountered is that not all pain is punishment, nor is all pleasure a reward. Much of life is a refining process. The toxic lessons passed down by parents or those who raised us are not the final word. Jesus spoke truth to this when He said in John 8:32 (AMP): "And you will know the truth [regarding salvation], and the truth will set you free [from the penalty of sin]." Knowing the truth isn’t just about understanding theology—it’s about breaking free from destructive patterns, unlearning harmful behaviors, and creating space for something better.
Through both Jesus’ teachings and Stoic philosophy, I’ve learned that control is an illusion. We can’t dictate what happens to us, only how we respond. Marcus Aurelius reminds us: “You have power over your mind—not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.” When we focus on mastering ourselves—our reactions, emotions, and impulses—we become free, regardless of our circumstances.
Another profound lesson is the value of forgiveness—not as a favor to others, but as liberation for ourselves. Jesus commanded in Matthew 6:14 (AMP): "For if you forgive others their trespasses [their reckless and willful sins], your heavenly Father will also forgive you." Forgiveness doesn't mean excusing the actions of others or denying the pain they caused; it means releasing ourselves from the burden of resentment. Similarly, Stoicism teaches us that carrying hatred only harms the one holding it.
I’ve learned that healing isn’t linear, and it often requires revisiting old wounds. But each time we return, we do so with new eyes and greater strength. Life presents the same lessons until we truly absorb them. As Seneca put it, “Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.” Through failure, loss, and conflict, I’ve learned that every ending carries the seeds of a new chapter.
Finally, I’ve come to understand the importance of living intentionally. Jesus summed it up perfectly: "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind." (Matthew 22:37 AMP) Life isn’t just about achieving goals or accumulating experiences—it’s about aligning our actions with our values and living with purpose. Stoicism complements this by reminding us that we are here to live in harmony with nature, and that starts with being true to ourselves.
So, what have I learned? I’ve learned that my past doesn’t define me, but it does shape me. I’ve learned that my failures were not the end, but invitations to grow. I’ve learned that love is stronger than fear, and peace is found not in control, but in acceptance. And most importantly, I’ve learned that the journey is ongoing—there is always more to discover, more to release, and more to become.
What have you learned so far? Take a moment to reflect on your own journey. No matter where you are in life, there’s always wisdom to uncover and space to grow.
Applying The Lessons
Knowledge without application is wasted potential. It’s one thing to learn, reflect, and journal about the truths we've uncovered; it’s another to take these lessons into the world and live them. This is where everything comes together—biblical principles, Stoic wisdom, and personal experience. Now is the time to apply what we’ve learned, not as a perfect person but as a work in progress.
Jesus said in Matthew 7:24 (AMP): "So everyone who hears these words of Mine and acts on them, will be like a wise man [a far-sighted, practical, and sensible man] who built his house on the rock." A solid foundation comes from not just knowing what’s right but living it daily. It’s about becoming someone whose life reflects the lessons they’ve learned—both the triumphs and the mistakes. Wisdom, after all, isn’t about knowing it all. It’s about being humble enough to grow and change with what life presents.
Stoicism echoes this idea in action. Epictetus wrote, “Don’t explain your philosophy. Embody it.” The true test of our learning is how we live when things are messy, when old patterns creep back in, and when circumstances challenge us. Do we fall back into destructive habits, or do we stop, breathe, and choose differently? Applying the lessons means breaking free from the autopilot mode we’ve lived on for so long and actively choosing a better way—even when it’s hard.
This doesn’t mean we will never fail or fall. In fact, failure is part of the process. What changes is how we respond to failure. As Jesus reminded His followers in Matthew 18:22 (AMP): "I say to you, not up to seven times, but seventy times seven." Forgiveness isn’t just for others—it’s for ourselves. We will stumble, but each stumble is an opportunity to stand back up, dust ourselves off, and try again. That’s the heart of both grace and resilience.
Applying these lessons also requires patience. Life unfolds slowly, and real change takes time. Seneca reminds us: “He who is brave is free.” True freedom lies not in controlling every outcome but in aligning ourselves with what we know to be right—no matter how long the process takes. Every decision to act with integrity, every moment of choosing kindness over anger, brings us closer to the person we are meant to become.
What does this look like practically? It looks like taking ownership of our actions without shame or denial. It means setting boundaries where they’re needed—not to punish others but to protect our peace. It means loving our families and friends from a place of freedom, not fear or control. And it means living intentionally, day by day, step by step—without needing everything to be perfect. As Jesus commanded in Matthew 5:16 (AMP): "Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good deeds and moral excellence, and [recognize and honor and] glorify your Father who is in heaven."
When we embody the lessons we’ve learned, we stop being victims of our past. We become creators of a new story. Applying the lessons of both Stoicism and Jesus’ teachings transforms how we engage with life. It’s not about trying to appear flawless; it’s about becoming whole.
Every challenge we face becomes a chance to practice these lessons in real time. Anger becomes an invitation to practice patience. Pain becomes an opportunity to cultivate endurance. Fear becomes a chance to practice courage. Through this process, we discover that the peace we’ve been searching for isn’t found in the absence of struggle—it’s found within us, in the choices we make moment by moment.
So where do we go from here? We keep going. Every day is another opportunity to show up, apply what we’ve learned, and live with purpose. We may not get it right all the time, but with each attempt, we come closer to the life we’re meant to live. And in the end, that’s all that really matters—not perfection, but progress.
The question for you now is: How will you apply the lessons in your life? Start small, take one step at a time, and remember—this is a journey, not a race. Be kind to yourself along the way.
Let's take a moment to consider a few things from the mindset of a spiritual believer that once embraced church teaching.
How old is this earth?
The Protestant Bible - one I'm somewhat familiar with - lays claim to the earth being roughly 4000 years old. Does it really? Let's look a little more closely at scripture and see how it stacks up against church teaching and secular science.
The idea of a 4000-year-old Earth largely stems from interpretations of biblical genealogies, like those found in Genesis. Archbishop James Ussher famously calculated the Earth’s creation date as 4004 BCE by adding up the ages of the patriarchs. However, nowhere in the Bible does it explicitly state this timeline. It is an interpretation, not a direct declaration.
The Amplified Bible provides deeper insights into the meaning of scripture through its clarifications. Genesis 1:1 reads, *"In the beginning God (Elohim) created [by forming from nothing] the heavens and the earth."* This verse says nothing about when the beginning was, only that it was initiated by a divine Creator. Could this 'beginning' align with scientific theories like the Big Bang? Why not? The Bible doesn’t give a timestamp, leaving room for interpretation.
Many Evangelical churches teach a young Earth perspective, often rooted in a literal six-day creation model. This teaching conflicts with modern scientific consensus, which estimates the Earth to be approximately 4.5 billion years old. The question is, must these views be mutually exclusive?
Consider this: time as described in Genesis may not be the same as human-measured time. Psalm 90:4 states, *"For a thousand years in Your sight are like yesterday when it is past, or as a watch in the night."* Could the 'days' of creation represent epochs or ages? This interpretation allows for harmonization between scripture and evidence found in geology and cosmology.
Faith invites believers to trust in God, but it doesn’t demand rejection of observable truth. If God is the author of both the Bible and the universe, shouldn’t they ultimately be in agreement? The Amplified Bible emphasizes God’s wisdom and power in verses like Romans 1:20: *"For ever since the creation of the world His invisible attributes, His eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly seen, being understood through His workmanship [all His creation, the wonderful things He has made]."* Science could be one way to explore the 'wonderful things He has made.'
Evangelical teaching often insists on strict literalism. But is it possible that such an approach misses deeper spiritual truths? For example, many Evangelicals claim certain political figures, such as Donald Trump, are chosen by God to fulfill divine purposes. Yet, scripture also warns against false prophets and placing trust in earthly leaders. Jeremiah 17:5 declares, *"Cursed is the man who trusts in and relies on mankind, making [weak, faulty human] flesh his strength."* Could this be a caution against conflating political agendas with divine will?
As someone exploring the Christian faith, I find myself asking: Is faith meant to dictate a rigid view of the world, or does it invite us into a deeper relationship with truth? If scripture and science seem at odds, is it our understanding of one—or both—that needs reexamination? And most importantly, how can faith guide us to live more compassionately and wisely, rather than entrenching division?
These are not questions I expect to answer overnight, but ones I hope will lead to meaningful dialogue between believers, seekers, and skeptics alike.
This blog is meant to provide a point of reflection and not one of condemnation. So, as I look back on my life, I must remind myself of this fact, learn the lesson I'm meant to reflect on, and make tomorrow better than the day before.
Listening to sermons from the late Charles Stanley, I'm hearing familiar words with fresh ears. Meaning - I'm looking through a new lens that isn't clouded by church teaching. Here's the thing.. I'm a minister, call myself a Free Thinker. But does the title of Minister really hold any significance in the way the real world operates? Certainly not. All the title does in my mind is add a few more letters to paperwork where I state my position as a minister. It equates me to that of a spiritual janitor that tells stories when not cleaning up messes. It's not glamorous, but accurate. So, in a very real sense, I am The Creator's janitor. I point out messes left behind by others, and it's my job to clean up what I can. Not to fix things, but to clean up the mess left behind by spiritually twisted humans - much like the religious leaders of Jesus' day.
What does it truly mean to be a Free Thinker? According to Webster's Collegiate Dictionary, a free thinker is defined as "one who forms opinions on the basis of reason independently of authority or tradition, especially a person whose religious opinions differ from established belief." This definition illustrates that being a free thinker is not about rejecting faith or authority outright but about approaching beliefs—spiritual or otherwise—with critical reasoning and personal reflection. It’s about courageously exploring ideas, questioning assumptions, and seeking truth, even when it challenges traditional norms. As a minister, this means I strive to honor scripture while recognizing the value of reason and the complexities of the human experience.
One of the things I'll attempt to clean up is the church teaching on the husband controlling the family with an iron fist. The hierarchy is there in scripture, but it has been twisted and manipulated to give husbands free reign to control the family with an iron fist. This is not what scripture dictates, but is implied through teaching in many Evangelical and Fundamentalist Protestant churches. What does scripture actually state regarding the family? What is intended, and how has church teaching led to generations of abuse while the leaders simply get shuffled to a new church, failing to address the systematic abuse?
In times of intense emotional conflict, the ancient philosophy of Stoicism offers valuable tools. Marcus Aurelius, a Roman emperor and Stoic philosopher, wrote: *"You have power over your mind—not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength."* This reflects the importance of emotional detachment—not in the sense of apathy, but in taking a step back to assess the situation rationally before reacting.
Epictetus, another prominent Stoic, emphasized that it is not events themselves but our thoughts about them that cause distress. When we are embroiled in emotional conflict, the practice of pausing, reflecting, and questioning our thoughts can prevent rash actions. Asking questions like *"What is within my control?"* or *"How would my best self respond to this?"* helps to prevent thoughts from escalating into toxic behaviors.
In intimate relationships, resolving conflict peacefully requires empathy and self-awareness. While traditional stereotypes suggest men are logical and women are emotional, real-life dynamics often defy such simplicity. People are complex, and we must address the human being voicing concerns rather than relying on preconceived notions.
For Men: Men often feel societal pressure to "fix" problems, but in emotional conflicts, listening is often more impactful than solving. Practicing active listening—where the focus is on truly understanding the other person’s perspective—can de-escalate tension. Techniques like paraphrasing ("What I hear you saying is...") show engagement and validate emotions without jumping to solutions.
For Women: Women are often socialized to express emotions more openly, but this can sometimes be overwhelming in conflict. Practicing mindfulness—acknowledging emotions without letting them dictate actions—can foster clarity. Asking questions like *"What outcome do I truly want from this conversation?"* helps to steer dialogue toward resolution rather than reaction.
For Both: At the core of peaceful conflict resolution is the principle of listening with the intent to understand, not to respond. Reflecting before speaking, avoiding accusatory language, and focusing on shared goals strengthen the relationship. Remember Paul’s words in James 1:19: *"Everyone must be quick to hear [be a careful, thoughtful listener], slow to speak [a speaker of carefully chosen words], slow to anger."* This timeless wisdom complements the Stoic practice of restraint and reflection.
In conflicts, throwing stereotypes out the window and addressing the unique individual is key. We must ask ourselves: *"Am I truly listening to their words, or am I reacting to my interpretation of their emotions?"* This shift in perspective builds trust and reduces volatility. By prioritizing the relationship over the need to "win," we create space for healing and mutual understanding.
As Seneca, a Stoic philosopher, reminds us: *"He who is brave is free."* Courage in conflict often means putting ego aside, embracing vulnerability, and committing to a solution that serves both parties. By blending Stoic detachment with Biblical principles of love and patience, we can navigate the complexities of intimate relationships with grace and wisdom.
This parable explores how moments of intense conflict can be transformed into opportunities for understanding and growth when both parties choose to listen, reflect, and reign in their emotions.
Once there was a couple, Mark and Sarah, who had been married for ten years. They had weathered many storms together, but lately, the stresses of work, parenting, and life seemed to leave little room for connection. One evening, Mark arrived home late from work, completely oblivious to the special dinner Sarah had prepared. It was their anniversary.
Sarah had spent hours cooking Mark’s favorite meal and setting the table with candles and flowers. When he walked in, still glued to his phone and carrying a bag of takeout, her heart sank. “You forgot, didn’t you?” she said, her voice trembling.
Mark froze. He looked at the table, then at Sarah, and the realization hit him like a punch to the gut. “I’ve had a long day,” he blurted defensively. “Do you know how much pressure I’m under? I can’t keep track of everything!”
Sarah’s eyes filled with tears. “It’s not about keeping track, Mark. It’s about showing that you care. I tried so hard to make tonight special, and you didn’t even notice!”
The room grew tense, their voices rising with the weight of hurt feelings and miscommunication. But then, something shifted. Mark paused mid-sentence, hearing the anger in his own voice. He saw the pain on Sarah’s face and realized that his justifications weren’t easing her hurt—they were adding to it. He took a deep breath, remembering the advice of a mentor: *When emotions run high, seek understanding, not victory.*
“Wait,” he said, softening his tone. “Let me try this again. You’re right. I messed up. I was so wrapped up in my own world that I didn’t see what you were doing for us tonight. I’m sorry, Sarah.”
Sarah, too, took a moment to reflect. She realized that while she felt deeply hurt, Mark hadn’t forgotten their anniversary out of malice. He had made a mistake, and his apology felt genuine. “I appreciate that,” she said quietly. “I just wanted us to have a moment together, something to remind us of why we fell in love in the first place.”
Mark nodded. “You’re absolutely right. Let’s sit down and enjoy the meal you prepared. The takeout can wait.”
As they shared the meal, they talked openly about their stresses, their feelings, and their hopes. They didn’t solve every problem that night, but they did something more important—they chose to see each other’s humanity instead of their mistakes.
Moral: In moments of conflict, it’s easy to let emotions escalate. But when both parties pause, reflect, and seek to understand rather than win, they create space for healing and growth. A relationship isn’t about being right; it’s about being united, even in imperfection.